Dumbfuck Backpacker Doing What Dumbfuck Backpackers Do

Published on 17th December 2015 by Stickboy BKK

The “Missing” Brit, Jordan Jacobs, turned up safe and well today on a beach in Krabi after some over-the-top headlines and stories in UK and Thai media fueled by his family members.

His sister started all the drama with a Facebook update earlier this week saying he’d been missing for four days and his family were worried about his safety as he’d sent “disturbing” messages before losing contact.

I seen Emily Jacob’s appeal for help in finding her brother shared on a Thai Facebook group and thought, meh.

Now you might be thinking that isn’t very charitable of me as the guy could have been in trouble, and yes he could have been but seeing so many social media appeals for “missing” people in Thailand who turn up after a few days or weeks leaves you knowing better to jump right in and share the appeal because 99% of the time when the story unfolds you often find people have cut contact following an argument or disagreement and their family stop thinking clearly and make a mountain out of a molehill.

And in my opinion, that is exactly what happened with Jordan Jacobs.


He told his family he wouldn’t be returning home for Christmas as planned after his year traveling overseas and they got pissed off about it.

In typical backpacker fashion, the 21-year-old got drunk or high and sent some dumbass messages that were taken out of context. Having no contact for a few days after suddenly makes him “missing” and in “danger”. Me thinks not.

He likely just didn’t want to listen to his family bitching and moaning or telling him what to do with his life as he was having a good time to himself bumming around the islands.

In typical tabloid fashion, the UK red tops jump on the story and go for the jugular with as much sensationalism as they can muster. It almost felt like they were hoping his mutilated body is going to be discovered and he died a grisly death. Wouldn’t that be a great story to fill their front pages with? Koh Tao: Part 2.

Now the backpacking bellend is getting lambasted on social media for his antics but for me he is just a dumbfuck 21-year-old backpacker doing what dumbfuck 21-year-old backpackers do. Nothing surprising or out of the ordinary there.

His sister is nothing more than a drama queen who needs to go have a word with herself in a dark cupboard for stirring up a shit storm because people will now be left second guessing any genuine appeals for help over her crying wolf.

The only people who dealt with this situation in the proper fashion were the Thai police. Now there’s the real shocker in this whole sorry mess that will no doubt rear its ugly head again in a month or two when we hit the repeat button over some other “missing” family member who might just have missed their flight and disappeared for ten days like the bloke from New Zealand earlier this year.

It seems we’ve created ourselves a society where if you don’t update your Facebook page every day, suddenly you’re “missing”. People used to backpack for months with no contact or the odd postcard that took days or weeks to arrive and no-one batted an eyelid.

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