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First Impressions: Kazy Kozy Soi Cowboy



Two nights in is far, far too early to render judgment on a new go-go bar, but given the anticipation behind what was assumed to be “Crazy House 2”, I popped in so as to pass along some first impressions.

Kazy Kozy may be Thinglish for “Crazy” and “Cosy” but it is neither of those things. It is decidedly not Crazy House 2 and is not cosy: It’s tiny.

The decision to place two rows of theatre-style bench seating around every wall made the former Old Dutch’s dining room look expansive in retrospect. The small amount of space left for the stage in the middle led to a decision to create two short platforms separated by a middle aisle. Each stage can accommodate up to four girls before they start skewering each other with stilettos.

Each platform is encircled by midget-height stools that stand only thigh-high. Those with arthritic knees need not apply. Scattered along the wall sofas are miniature (seeing a theme here?) cocktail tables that are impossible to sit behind, only alongside.

Those hoping for design improvements over Crazy House’s industry-leading poor layout also will be disappointed. Each stage has several pointy marble corners that that already are proving perilous to testicles.

Now, there are plans to open – “soon” staffers said – a first floor which may or may not be larger than the ground floor. Signage outside purports to explain the concept, with “L1” being “Kazy” (or Crazy in non-Thinglish) and L2 being “Kozy” (Cosy).

The reality, however, may prove just the opposite. Unlike Crazy House, there is no glass ceiling on L1, meaning what happens on L2 stays on L2. In the end, it could be the upper floor that gets Kazy, while downstairs, with lots of prying eyes popping in at the entrance to Soi Cowboy, will remain decidedly Kosy.

That certainly seems to be the game plan on the first weekend, with about 20 dancing damsels clad in halter tops and short skirts, although knickers seemed to be optional.

First Impressions Kazy Kozy Soi Cowboy

You won’t find any familiar faces from Crazy House here. The former papasan from Nana Plaza’s Billboard, Bangkok Bunnies and Playskool, along with a broken-down ladyboy from Five Star (co-owned by the Crazy House crew) have brought in new working wenches who, for the most part, were slim, smiley and attractive. Some obviously felt confined by their abundant clothing and did their best to entice punters with what lies underneath those short skirts.

Someone also took a broom and a wet cloth to the place, as there was no sign of the construction debris from Friday night. The lights are modern LEDs, not Crazy House’s seizure-inducing variety, and the music was loud, but bearable, techno familiar to anyone who has been to the sister bar around the corner.

But that’s really where the resemblance to Crazy House ends. Kazy Kozy is far more akin to Five Star than the Soi 23 den of debauchery, from the layout to the lighting to the dress code to prices: The typical 170-baht drink in Crazy House is 180 baht here. I didn’t sample a lady drink, but there is a large, animated LED menu right outside the front door, so there will be no surprises. (Five Star charges 200 baht for lady drinks.)

Also notable: Kazy Kosy uses computerized bills as opposed to the written bins you get around the corner.

All in all, it has been a smooth start for Kazy Kosy. Those expecting the naked antics of Crazy House will be disappointed, but the potential remains for some Soi 23 spillover once the first floor opens.

Stickboy aka Sticky Boy aka Mike McKay aka Mike McKwai, Wild Mike, Magic Mike, Mr Mike, and a fair few more best forgotten, is a party animal with hollow legs who loves music, current affairs, beer, food, causing trouble on Twitter, and making the most of life without worrying too much about what people think or say about his antics. You can send him stuff here -


The Countdown Is On And Time Is Running Out Fast For Some



The Countdown Is On And Time Is Running Out Fast For Some

The visa amnesty in Thailand ends this weekend and the clock is ticking for tens of thousands who still don’t know what to do, can’t get an extension, can’t leave and return to activate another 90 days on their multiple entry visas and of course, those that claim they are “stuck” here when in fact they just don’t want to return home.

Those claiming they are stuck deserve no sympathy. Nobody is “stuck” anywhere.

Six months have past and many have enjoyed an extra half year in Thailand without worrying about their visa situation. I’ve read hundreds of stories over the past few months from people with far fetched tales that have more holes in them than an 18-hole golf course.

The bottom line is some people love it here and don’t want to leave but they can’t get a visa as they don’t have a job, don’t have a wife or mostly, don’t have the cash to support a visa application that requires money in the bank.

Agents having made a mint charging in the region of 55-70,000 baht for Volunteer visas. Others are cooking the (bank) books for those seeking a retirement visa and coining it in charging inflated fees knowing people are desperate to stay.

On the other hand, many who were here legally before the COVID carry on kicked in are in a difficult position.

Married men and woman who have a Non-O multiple entry visa spring to mind.

Those using this method of living in Thailand long term arrive with a shiny new visa sticker in their passport and get a 90-day stamp upon arrival at the airport.

Just before the 90 days is up they have 2 choices:

– do a border hop and get another 90 days when they come back into the country
– go to immigration and get a 60-day extension for 1900 baht.

With the country closed to international travellers, those border hops just aren’t possible and some have found during the past six months their visas have expired leaving them unable to pop over to Savannakhet where they could apply for a new one.

Those still with time left on their visa are now in a jam too as they can’t exit and re-enter.

For reasons unknown, the government nor immigration have addressed or come up with a solution for those in this situation.

So come Saturday 26 September, they are left with no choice but to either leave or stay and face prosecution and blacklisting from Thailand if they are caught.

Some have been given an extra 60 days for visiting family that sees them through until late November, but what then if the borders are still shut?

And that’s me just talking about people living here on a multiple entry marriage visas.

There are thousands of other stories and situations that will see people forced to leave or ignore the warnings of being fined and blacklisted who choose to remain and take their chances until borders reopen allowing them to do what is needed to live here legally.

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Fantasy Footbun




Fantasy Footbun

With the 2020 / 2021 football season about to start, it is time to test your footy knowledge and compete against the best of the best of Thailand Twitter’s Wannabe Football Managers.

With the first Gameweek closing on 12th September at 5pm (Thai time) there’s still some time to turn off Pornhub, clean yourself up and sign up for the league. And for god’s sake put some clothes on. (League code: q93lfx).

Let us kick things off with a look at the (currently) 23 teams competing in the Thai Twitter League.

We have two accounts new to Fantasy Premier League, Johan B’s ‘Digiman’ and Anthony M’s ‘Siam Swoon’. Time will tell if they pick up the rules quick enough to enjoy the game and do not lose interest by Christmas and languish at the bottom with a team full of injuries and nobodies.

At the other end of the table, the three teams with the highest score in the 2019-2020 season were:

1. 2313 : Cain in the Kok – Paul C

2. 2283 : Lockdown City – Alec P

3. 2281 : One Man Clapping – Nick W

Three managers looking to improve on last year’s total are Expat Asia’s ‘Sukhumvit FC’, Tim P’s ‘Maximum20characters’ and Johan J’s ‘FarangPilot FC’ that finished with 1729, 1920 and 1913 points respectively.

There is still time to join! Log in via the Premier League app or on the website and use this code to sign up for the Thailand Twitter League. League code: q93lfx

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Tales From The Front: Sunday Dinner On A Saturday Night



Stickboy, Fatface, and The Keeper are sat in a British pub on lower Sukhumvit on a Saturday night…

A gathering of the clan earlier in the evening for some birthday beers meant Stickboy’s belly needed filling before meeting back up with everyone who had gone in different directions ahead of the cake cutting ceremony at Lighthouse sometime around 10pm.

Somchai The Dog had popped in for a couple of shandies but was looking like a burst couch and was having none of it ordering takeout before disappearing into the dark Bang Na bound on the BTS.

The other half of the Dangerous Duo, Digiman, wasn’t ready for home just yet but had no interest in food.

The Keeper orders quesadillas while smooth-talking his missus, girlfriend or gik – maybe all three – and wasn’t paying attention to much as Fatface orders Chips & Curry sauce for Stickboy.

sunday roast on a saturday night

The food arrives, everyone digs in, more beer is ordered to wash down the grub as all four eat what’s sat on the table.

The Keeper is still on the phone like an old sweetie wife and starts making space on the table with his free hand when a waitress arrives over his shoulder with another plate of food.

He clears a space in front of Fatface and Stickboy who look at each other thinking that’s an odd place to put a roast dinner they both think The Keeper has ordered for himself.

He ends his call and tucks into the roast pork telling everyone to help themselves which they do.

Chips are in the gravy, potatoes are in the curry sauce and the plate is emptying at a fair pace as four mouths feast on the Sunday dinner.

More than halfway through the food a member of the service staff appears and starts talking to The Keeper with Fatface joining in.

Something is amiss.

“Hey Stickboy, did you order the pork roast?”, enquires The Keeper.

“No mate, I thought you did.”

In his best Shaggy voice, he fires back, “It wasn’t me”.

It turns out some poor bloke sat at the bar was sitting patiently waiting on his dinner the staff had wrongly delivered that the four scavengers had all but demolished each of them thinking someone else at the table fancied a Sunday dinner on a Saturday night.

sunday roast on a saturday night

The four grubbers thought this was hilarious and all just shrugged their shoulders laughing having told the service staff to take it away… until Stickboy’s bin arrived with a Roast Pork Loin at 295 baht on it.

He wasn’t laughing any more.

Had it not been for the fact his mates own the pub he’d likely have upset the waitresses with a few choice words having been billed for something he didn’t order with zero conversation between staff and customer over what was a genuine mistake on the part of everyone involved.

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