Top 10 Bar Girl Lies 2015 Edition

Published on 29th January 2015 by Stickboy BKK

Top 10 Bar Girl Lies

Bangkok bar girls lie. They all do it. Your “girl” isn’t different regardless of what you think, she lies too and deep down you know it.

Now I’m not here to knock bar girls, far from it. I actually find it amusing and accept that in amongst the lies there will be some truth but I don’t plan on getting involved in a relationship that goes beyond me securing their services in a short time hotel for a few hours of fun so I let it go over my head with a smile and the offer of another drink.

So why do the girls lie so much? In my opinion its because the customers want them to.

The majority of guys going into bars don’t want to think little Lek has had sex with several other guys that week or even that day. He wants to think that she likes him and she is a bit special. Not like the others. The fact that she is a hooker and he is going to pay her for sex doesn’t even enter his mind. He is going to bed her with his charm and good looks.

Over the past 20 years the big game changers in the bar girl business was first email and now mobile phones, however, even with modern technology, the lies remain pretty much the same but I thought there’d be no harm in running down the pick of the bunch as a kindly reminder to those out there who drop off their brains at left luggage when they land at the airport.

Top 10 Bar Girl Lies 2015

Top 10 Bar Girl Lies 2015

I No Have Boyfriend

Yeah right. Who dropped you off at work? Is that a photo of you and your brother in your purse? All those farrangs on LINE are just friends, right?

Work Bar Only 2 Week

Which bar has she worked in for only two weeks? This one? What about all the other bars she has worked in around Bangkok and Pattaya for the past few years?

My Phone No Power

You try to phone your teerak and her phone is off… when she finally gets off her back with her boyfriend / customer she will simply say her phone had a dead battery. I don’t know any Thai, bar girl or not, who is ever without their phone. 20% power remaining = end of the world is near.

I Love You

This is one of my favourites and within an hour a bar girl can utter those three little words. Did she see your account balance at the ATM?

You Very Big

Now unless she is a horny little minx and wanting a good roll in the hay, this can be one of those top pocket excuses not to do the business. A lot of humming and hawing with plenty of ego massaging that maybe results in a handjob or BJ to avoid intercourse with someone she really doesn’t want to service. Unless you are packing some serious sausage you aren’t hung like a horse despite what little miss cute ass tells you.

You Very Big

I Like Old Man Fat With Good Heart

This translates as I will be with you because you have a fat wallet, not a fat stomach.

I No Have Baby

As soon as her towel gets undone back at the hotel her map of the world will be all too evident unless she has tattooed her belly. She can’t hide all those stretch marks so take a look at her ass. “Close light teelak, I shy”. LOL.

I No Like Thai Man

Oh really? See #1

He Only My Friend, We Only Go Eat

And she will tell the next guy in the queue the exact same thing about you. You could also ask what was she actually eating… Mr Banana?

I Finish Work Bar Go My Village

Yeah for two or three days until she gets bored after blowing off the cash you gave her. Then it’s back to the big smoke and party time with her friends at the bar she had quit. A few drinks later and the offer of a 3k baht short time stint and it’s back on the merry-go-round.

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